Note: When I was in 9th or 10th grade, all the girls got pulled aside into a special PE class to teach us about protecting ourselves against sexual assault. We learned tips like, 'check in the back seat of your car before you get in', and, 'if you live alone, just put your first initial and last name in the phonebook'--your generic fear based tactics. At the time, I didn't think anything of it, but as I got older it really started pissing me off that it was the girls who needed a class. It's the guys who are causing the problem, why don't they have to attend a class to teach them not to assault women? The following post is my version of what that class might be like.
OK, gentlemen, settle down. Welcome to How to Not Sexually Abuse Women 101, if you want to graduate, you have to pass this class, so pay attention. It's actually pretty simple.
A woman's sexuality is hers and hers alone. You may not take it without her permission. Ever. You may not have sex with her, you may not take pictures up her skirt with your camera phone, you may not so much as kiss her without her permission. You must not drug her, you must not threaten violence to her. You must ask her. You may seduce her, you may use all your charms and wiles to convince her, but the decision is still hers. Always.
Any questions?
You in the back, yes? What if she's your wife? Still no.
What if you meet her in a bar? Nope, still not.
What if she is dressing in a sexually alluring way, wearing short skirts and low cut tops? What if she is flirting with you? You still must get her permission first. Always.
Here's an analogy for you. You see a woman walking down the street who appears very wealthy: she has a large diamond ring on her finger, and other expensive jewellry, and in fact, her wallet is sticking up out of her purse, and you can see several hundred dollar bills poking out from that. If you take that money from her purse, it is stealing, and you are gonna get busted. Telling the judge that this woman was flaunting her wealth, taunting you with it even, ain't gonna fly. The judge will laugh at you and throw your sorry ass in jail. It's the same with a woman's sexuality. It's hers, and you can't take it, unless she gives it to you.
Here's the good news, guys. Women like sex. Women LOVE sex. It really isn't that difficult to get laid in appropriate ways. We'll talk more about that tomorrow. Thanks, and please read pages 32-36 in your book, the section titled Birth Control is Your Responsibility Too.
Now I know what your next career should be...
Posted by: Kimberly | 2005.05.27 at 08:40
Excellent post.
Posted by: Mikey | 2005.05.27 at 12:22
Briliant, of course that is how it should work. I like how you think. P.
Posted by: paige | 2005.05.28 at 15:16
yes, and part b would be about how if they get someone pregnant, they have to raise the kid...
Posted by: lisa | 2005.05.28 at 20:30
You should expand this and get a copyright. Or better yet, post it on some of the popular sites for the young readers. Girls also have to understand they CAN still say no after the kissing begins.
Posted by: peg | 2005.05.29 at 21:01
I'd like to teach this class with you. Make sure we get some balance in there :)
Posted by: scott | 2005.06.01 at 13:24