journeys of a restless mind

are you kind?

I don't do well when I don't get enough sleep.  You'd think I'd be used to it given the fact that 'sleep-deprived' was my middle name for the first six years of the kidlet's life.   But even with the aid of my beloved caffeine I'm still feeling rather unable to deal with everything today.  Being this tired brings out the worst in me, or at least those qualities of which I'm least fond.  I feel insecure, powerless, overly emotional.   Then I proceed to get annoyed at myself for feeling this way.  I really need to start cutting myself some slack.  If I want any good at all in this big world, it has to start right here.  I'm trying to do something that on the surface appears easy, but is proving to be very challenging indeed, particularly when focused inward.  I simply want to be kind. 

nubes

It's a rainy Sunday morning in Seattle.  There's something metal on the roof that is pinging when the drops hit.  I woke up feeling out of sorts, that rock-in-my-shoe feeling in my heart.  I made coffee, then put the beans that I'd soaked yesterday on to boil.  Finally, I shot some fotos.  Taking pictures has become my comfort food. 

(Those of you who've been reading me for awhile know that I think dying flowers are as beautiful as fresh ones.   I've posted those fotos here,  and here, and finally here if you wish to check them out.  The latest in the series are below.)

spotted last night

A man in a Sponge Bob t-shirt and spurs.  (And he was working that look.)

The kidlet's dad is officially unemployed. 

can you stand more flowers?

wow

I thought that I took pretty fotos of flowers.  Until I saw this.  By fellow Club Mom blogger Tracey.

I like to think of myself as a go-with-the-flow kinda gal.  But it's not true.  I grasp at the good stuff, trying to hold onto it tightly, to make it stay.  Just opening up that fist to let something out--something you're afraid you'll never get again--is the hardest gesture of all.  It's already gone anyway.  Each moment comes and then it goes.  You can't make any of it stop ever. 

things that are distracting me from work today

The swallows.  They are only in town for a short time each year, and their swooping and dipping and general birdy carrying-on is quite fascinating.

Wanting to tell you that the secret Club Mom mystery blogger that I alluded to before is none other than the venerable Ms. Grace Davis herself.  In addition to her many other accomplishments, Grace runs marathons.  For fun and glory and bling.  Is there anything this woman cannot do?  I don't think so.  One of the things she does best, of course, is write.  Check out her Marathon Mom blog here.

Thinking about the yummy grapefruit truffle (foto soon foto below!) that I scored at the Ballard Farmer's Market yesterday from Zenboy Chocolates.  Like their website says, I need some "illumination to the palate and freedom of the mind."

ranunculus is funculus