Diary of a Single Mom on the Edge

foto saturday, roygbiv edition

Hijo is always on the lookout for rainbows.  He knows the conditions that make them possible and watches the sky intently when it is cloudy, rainy, and sunny all at the same time.  Therefore it was with a bit of wistfulness that I noticed the best rainbow EVER yesterday and Hijo wasn't home to see it.

Fotos of rainbows are always pale imitations of the real thing.  For one, it was too big and too close to fit into the frame.  The intensity of the colors just don't shine through, either.

I am somewhat jaded to the whole rainbow experience; ya seen one, ya seen 'em all.  I suppose that's part of why we become parents, to be in the company of someone who thinks that everything good or beautiful or tasty is the best EVER.

Hijo's been away for a couple of days and I am missing him.  He would have wanted to take a foto of the rainbow, too.  He got a little digitial camera for Christmas and has been toting it around and pointing it in my face a lot. 

"What can I take a picture of?" has become a common question in our house. 

Last weekend, he and I saw something pretty cool that I did manage to get a foto of.  It's yet another natural thing that's difficult to photograph well.

It's a jellyfish!  Jellyfish are quite common in the waters of Puget Sound, but they are usually clear.  This one was mostly egg-yolk colored and big.  It swam all around the marina, attracting attention wherever it went.  It was, of course, the best jellyfish EVER.

On our way home, we passed by the skate park and watched the skaters speed around and down into the deep bowls of concrete and up again.  I imagined Hijo in a few years hanging out there with his friends, wanting no part of mom on a Sunday.  I hope he'll still take the time to look up at the sky, and I hope he'll remember that each moment of his life is the best.  Ever.

random weird thing of the day

I noticed that my silverware drawer seemed stuffed to the gills, and I was amazed at how much silverware I have.  Then I realized that it seemed so full precisely because it is such a rare occurrence that all my silverware is clean at any given time.  Sigh.

better to give

Wow, it's funny how the karmic wheels turn some days.  I wanted to do something nice for the lovely woman who is taking care of Hijo, so I tucked a bit extra into her pay this week.  I also bought some flowers for my new boss, who is just about the best boss you could ever hope for and who does a lot of the kind of work that can often go unnoticed by others, even though they depend on it.  She was genuinely surprised and happy at the gift, and I felt so glad to give her something nice in her day.

When I arrived home, I discovered a suprise of my own.  Something quite unexpected and lavishly given--a true gift of love.  It brought tears to my eyes, I was so blown away by it. 

I don't think I got this gift simply because I'd just given to others, but you might say there was a certain propensity for giving in the air today, a vibe, if you will.  I'm grateful I got to be a part of it.  As I've mentioned before, things seem to be sliding into place in my new life here, and it is such a relief, like slipping into cool water on a hot day.  I can feel myself floating, my eyes closed, little waves lifting me and letting me down, gently.

scattered

I might be a bit scattered as I re-adjust to this full time work dealio.  Mornings especially are quite hectic.  I really liked not having much more to do than throw on a pair of jeans and walk to the bus stop with Hijo.  Trying to actually make myself presentable for an office situation takes work. 

Then there's my utter lack of desire to cook dinner when I get home from work.  It's easy to justify getting take-out.  That, plus lunch and daycare and I'm pretty much breaking even.*

I have this strange, lovely feeling that everything is as it should be.  Of course, good Buddhists everywhere know that everything is always as it should be.  I'm not such a good Buddhist.  I tend to judge.  But for now I am happily going with the flow.

I don't think I can stand living in this town if I don't learn to sail. 

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*Not really, but it feels like it sometimes.

fotoless friday, RIP camera

My camera has died a quick and painless death.  I took it flying with my dad and me last weekend, and I think the excitement was just too much for it.  I put fresh batteries in it and brought it to Hijo's last day of school, hoping to capture fotos of the teacher getting a pie in his face*, but it just whirred and beeped, and extended and retracted its lens without ever getting ready to shoot.

I have messed around with it in various ways, trying to fix the problem, but when you're dead, you're dead, and I think there is no resucitating my faithful Olympus C4040Z.  I will miss it terribly, it's been a good camera, and I know it well.  It was given to my by an ex-boyfriend, just as he was breaking my heart.  I will try and dig up some old fotos for you so as to continue my foto friday tradition.  And course, a new camera must be procured soon.

Meanwhile, my new job is going very well, and I'm feeling happy.

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* He auctions off the right to get him with a whipped cream pie.  They use play money that they've been using as a tool in the classroom all year long.  The winning bid was $1060.  He also auctions off the right for one of the kids to cut his hair.  He's a brave man.

push me pull you

As the mother of a Mexican-American child, certain things are important to me.  Trying to keep Hijo at least somewhat bilingual is one of them.  As such, I notice that more and more things like signs and labels that we encounter every day are written in both English and Spanish.  For the most part, I think this is terrific. What drives me crazy is the all-too-often poor quality of the Spanish. 

Since most of you don't speak Spanish, I won't go on and on about how terrible some of the word-by-word translations are that I've seen (if you think you are getting anything even remotely like true speech when you use an automatic translator like Babel Fish, you are very very wrong), but there is one glaring error that appalls me every time I see it.

On the front doors of most stores there is a little indicator as to whether you should "push" or "pull" to get in.  At the JC Penneys stores in our area, they have this information in Spanish as well.  Except that they get it so wrong as to be embarrassing.  The word for "pull" in Spanish is "jalar."  A "j" in Spanish is roughly pronounced like an "h" in English.  So "jalar" is pronounced pretty much "hah-lar."  An "h" in Spanish is silent.  The word for today is "hoy," which is pronounced "oy."  Are you still with me? 

On the doors of JC Penny stores it instructs you to "halar."  Which of course isn't even a word in Spanish, and would sound nothing like the word for "pull" if you tried to read it.  How could something so basic--most first year students of the language know it--get by the deciders at JC Penny?   I'd rather have everything in English than in a Spanish that has no resemblance to the actual language.

Makes we want to go drink a cerveza. 

the last day

Not only was it the last day of school today, but also my last day of unemployment.  I turned in three stories to their respective editors, including my first piece for a magazine! Now it's time to resume regular ol' 9-to-5 work.  It will be strange after this big expanse of relatively free time to have somewhere to be every weekday again, but the time has come for a more structured life.

The last day of school always makes me sad.  Hijo had such a great experience. It could have been such a disaster, coming to a new school in a new town, but right from the start, he slipped into their world and he belonged.  I hope I'll be able to say the same thing about my new job.

quick sunday update

First and foremost, happy father's day.  I know at least one dad reads this regularly, and he's not even mine!  But the real reason I posted was to let you know that all you kind, wise folks who said that the childcare situation would work out are right!  I'm surprised and pleased and grateful as all get out that I can indeed start my new job without leaving Hijo to wander the streets by himself.  It all just sort of fell into my lap.  I let folks know about my situation, and voila, somebody had just what I needed. 

Off to celebrate with my dad now...

foto friday: squicked out edition

I've got earwigs in my mailbox.  And boy, are they gross.  This morning, perhaps because it is raining, it was chock full of them, wiggling all around and crawling on top of each other.  Ewwwwww!  I think they actually live in the wood that the mailbox is affixed to.  I know that they are pretty much harmless and they don't crawl into your ears, and I don't even think their little pincers (called forceps, I have learned) could pinch you at all, but they still squick me out.  Don't get me wrong, I am a highly bug tolerant person.  I don't squish spiders, and I think most insects are pretty fascinating.  Some are even beautiful.

Like that dude, who was spotted atop Mt. Walker a couple of weeks ago.  Earwigs, however, are not my friends. 

Hijo has figured out that I am averse to these creatures and so he is always trying to scare me by telling me there is one on my back or something.  It is precisely for that reason that many folks choose to never have children at all.  I am stuck with mine, however, and so I can only hope that he gets tired of frightening his poor mother, because you know for sure that even though I am determined to ignore him every time he says something about an earwig on me, one day there will actually be  an earwing on me, and then I will be sorry.

In other local creature news, there is a pair of crows that has been hanging out on the wires near my house, all cozy with each other, grooming and snuggling, and practically getting it on (though I'm sure that's mighty tricky when you are balancing on a wire).  And for some reason I find this very sweet, and also somehow very sad.  I must confess that there are times when I think it would be nice to have someone sidle up alongside me and rub their beak against my neck, you know? 

weird random thing of the day

I noticed on Hijo's tube of Superman toothpaste that there is a blurb in tiny little print in an odd place that states: "For more information about Superman visit dccomics.com".  Not "Check out Superman at dccomics.com!" or "Cool games and content!"  or even "More Superman stuff at..."  Nope, they worded it as if Superman were a health related issue like gingivitis or flossing that kids needed to research.  Maybe they think we parents aren't familiar with this caped fellow and need to find out if he's wholesome enough for our darlings' mouths or something.  Very odd indeed.