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it's all clear to me now

Oh, I get it! The current financial crisis is the fault of gay people.  No, wait.  It's really the fault of blacks and other minorities.  [via SistersTalk]

I wonder who will benefit from the bailout? Probably those evil poor people who set this all up.

And if you haven't seen this cartoon, you really should check it out. [via Karen]

Been missing the city lately with a sharpness that catches me by surprise. For all the beautiful skies and low tides and sense of space here, there is a lack of other things that I also love. 

After typing that, I looked up and the sunrise colored clouds floating slowly behind the waving branches of the giant fir tree across the street held me captive long enough to make me forget the city again. Am so fickle.

amor

I am simultaneously in love with Tina Fey and Sherman Alexie right now.

rambly

Feeling blue and wondering if it isn't just an end-of-summer letdown kinda thing. Can't quite write it off so easily, though. Things in general seem to be terrifically fucked up. I am enjoying my stint as a soccer mom, however, which is a pleasant surprise. Little League had been kind of a bummer, so my expectations of soccer were fairly low.  Turns out Hijo is really good at soccer ("Of course, mom, I'm Mexican.") and his - co-ed! - team is overall quite good. I love watching their games and hollering at them from the sidelines. One of the girls on the team who had seemed kind of shy around the ball scored three goals yesterday.  It was awesome.  Yes, I am totally propping up my sad inner child who, during her  soccer days, played on a team that never won one single game by reveling in Hijo's successes. It's my god-given parental right. Right?

Not suprisingly, the person that I know who will be most screwed by the economic downturn is Hijo's dad, who is already so completely financially incompetent as to have dug himself into a deep pit even in a good economy. He's had a really crappy couple of years, and all the coming-to-the-rescue attempts that I make (and my dear supportive family makes) seem to be for naught as he ends up in the same near-crisis place every couple of months. Our situation is such a blatant case of the personal being political that I can hardly bear to even mention it. Hijo is going to damn well know how to manage money. His dad likes to take the "I am an artist and I don't care about money" tack, which is all fine except everybody knows that the only people who can afford to not care about money are those who have plenty of it, and Hijo's dad doesn't qualify.  He needs a sugar mama patron of the arts to come along and save him, because I'm done with trying.

Then there's work, which is unsettled and a bit unsettling right now. My stomach's been bugging me the last few days and I can't figure out if it's the economy, Hijo's dad, work, loneliness,or my gall bladder. I'll let you know if I have any epiphanies.

I miss

I miss speaking Spanish, I miss writing poems, I miss dancing, I miss being kissed, I miss the smell of charred tortillas, I miss the glass of fresh-squeezed orange juice that Gena would leave for us each morning, I miss the way the kids called me tea-chair, I miss feeling sexy.

gratitude

I love Tina Fey & Amy Poehler so much

blue 2

it's time

Most of the prep work is done, and now it's time to get the party started. I was strangely excited by the arrival of the sanikans yesterday, and  when they put up the big tent that will host the music stage and the bar I couldn't stop grinning. The boats will start cruising in today. Our little marina will be crammed with gorgeous wooden boats both in the water and all around it.

Love of wooden boats is a kind of fever. You either catch it or you don't. Some people get it bad, and end up building boats in their garages or even living rooms and then sail or row off on magnificent adventures.  Others, like me, mostly admire their functional beauty and try to hitch a ride. We daydream a lot.

From my perch at the main gate, I won't get to do or see much of anything except for the thousands of people that we will welcome into our world from now until Sunday evening. The days will blur together and I will be hoarse from talking and exhausted from running around dealing with all the weird little things that are bound to come up. I play a very small role in this bigger thing, but I am proud to be a part of it. All the love and enthusiasm creates a sort of magic that hangs in the air, and it's there for anyone who wants to come by and share it.